


Memories of Inkopolis

by inknoodle



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:33:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 4,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26995234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inknoodle/pseuds/inknoodle
Summary: A lot of drabbles I wrote on Pastebin. That's it.





	1. Pearlescent and Gelatinous

"Jellies? What are those?"  
  
"They're all around Inkopolis, Eight!" Pearl squished one. "Some of them even watch us live."  
  
"So that mem cake was..."  
  
"That would be the clothing vendor! He seems nice, you should visit him!"  
  
Eight walked up to a jelly that seemed to be touching the floor. She touched the floor as well. It was dry and solid, unlike the ground in her hometown.  
  
"I like this new place," she muttered.  
  
Pearl bent down next to Eight and touched the floor too. It reminded her of when she was a child and liked to mimic the jellies. She even had a few pictures her parents took of her doing it.  
  
She looked over at Eight and smiled.  
  
"You're gonna love it here!"  
  
"I'm glad you took me to the surface, Pearl."  
  
"I'm glad I met you, Eight."


	2. I Don't Get Paid Enough Ability Chunks

Swatting salmonoids was always trouble. Workers would report little marks from bites and sickness from all that green gunk. So much for all those tickets and free gear. The profreshionals would try and protect the ones who got lucky, knowing the horrors of Grillers and the like.  
  
One worker had known all too much. The first to take up the job. They nicknamed this worker Tomato, after Run-Speed Tomato, his favorite drink. He was known as the best player in the industry. When a friend of his went out to go poach some salmon for fun, they were unable to find out where he was.  
  
She talked with her friends after a few waves. They were heading back to Inkopolis Plaza.  
  
"I'm serious! One day, he just disappeared!"  
  
An octoling girl scoffed, looking into the water.  
  
"You really don't believe that, right?"  
  
"Missing person cases exist!"  
  
"People?!"  
  
The inkling girl sneered, her nose scrunching up.  
  
"Oh, haha, I get it! There ARE no people!"  
  
Another inkling, this one male, rolled his eyes.  
  
"Could you two cut it out already? Nobody wants to hear about your dumb teasing!"  
  
This octoling, Cho, tended to be very snooty, not caring about any inklings whatsoever. Despite integrating into their society, she resented them for all the hate they caused. They didn't create too much hate, but her still-Octarian brain felt as if they did.  
  
The ride the rest of the way was silent.  
  
Cho still wasn't happy with what the inkling girl and boy, Ponyo and Melon, told her.   
  
Ponyo had a habit of drinking any sort of pink thing. She was also very gullible.  
  
There was a drink on the table with her name on it. It looked so deliciously delectable. A new drink? Yummy!  
  
She drank it.  
  
She felt tired.  
  
Cho watched as Ponyo slept on the plaza table and smiled.  
  
She was going to know exactly where her friend went.


	3. It's Only Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was originally for a fic where Agent Three, San-go, was being stalked by the Squid Sisters. Enjoy.

San-go was at a nightly concert. Her friend watched with sparkling eyes. Squid Squad? Performing live? And a front-row ticket for them?! It was quite cheap! This could only end well, maybe even in-

A loud guitar riff shocked both of them. They just finished their last song, Splattack. Ichiya, the vocalist and guitarist, put his instrument down. He held his hand out to none other than San.

What was she supposed to do? Shake it?

She gave him a high-five. He gave her a thumbs-up. The friend got the same treatment. Other members did things as well. Namida was giving out albums, Murasaki was taking photos, and Ikkan was receiving gifts.

The goal for tonight was to get one autograph. Just one.

But she couldn't ask. Going up to one of them was hard. A large lump formed in her throat. There was no way she could do it! She was so nervous. Her legs shook as she approached the vocalist.

"E-Excuse me, sir. Could you ma-maybe sign my album cover, please?"

"Maybe? I'd love to!"

He whistled. All his friends came over.

"Are you nervous?" asked Ichi.

"A little."

"Oh," he gave a warm, welcoming smile. "I'm sure they'll like you!"

Why was he so nice to her? He didn't even know her!

A squid with a tie walked over, followed by a sea urchin and the tallest, oldest member.

"What's up, Ichi?"

"Somebody wants us to sign their album. You have your pen, right Namida?"

She nodded.

They all turned towards her. Feeling all these eyes on her made her sick. She felt so disgusting! Did they hate her?

One member looked at her, tilting her head.

"What's your name, anyway?"

"I-It's San-go."

The taller one stretched, giving her the cover back.

"Here," he said.

He handed her a sticker. Four of them.

All of them waved at her, then announced that they were heading back home. Their fans cheered, waving goodbye. They were so happy. She stared back at her cover. Each of the signatures had a little message, all written in marker.

"Did you enjoy the concert, San-go?" said one in orange marker.

"Play it loud!" said one in green.

"You've earned it." said one in purple.

"I'm glad you like our songs!" said one in blue.

It felt like a prized possession.

Her friend got a photo. But she wasn't jealous. Who could be mad at a friend with an ancient relic? Even if it was grounded in San's hands, she could feel it floating. Emitting some sort of light. So beautiful!

"Goodnight, San!" said her friend, running back home with a smile.

"Night, Kame."

She was tired when she got to her flat. Her eyes were closing themselves.

"You're awfully late."

"I know. Saw a concert."

"A concert? Squid Squad?! Did you get front-row tickets?"

San-go groaned.

"Callie, why are you even here?"

"Wuuuuh?!" she covered her mouth, gasping. "How did you know it was me?"

"I've had to hear you on and off for a week straight. I know what you sound like."

"Oh yeah! I-I didn't forget, I'm just saying-"

Before Callie could finish, her pupil disappeared upstairs. Shoeboxes were piled on her desk, along with two specials. A banner and two posters lined the wall. Weapons and toys were sprinkled in between. Again, San's eyes found comfort in the album.

...Were the sisters envious? Would they rip this up? Could she ask for another signature?

"Back again, San?"

"Wah!" she shrieked, turning into a squid. "M-Marie?!"

She laughed.

"You're adorable when you're scared! I knew you weren't all bark and bite."

Marie picked the terrified girl up as the latter struggled in her grip.

"Come on, you must be shaking in your tentacles! Poor thing."

"Let me go, let me go!"

When taking notice of the cover, she tilted her head.

"Oh? What's this?" She bent over, picking it up. "It's signed?! Lucky you, Three."

"Leave that alone, it's important!"


	4. The Inky Perils of Cloudy Morals

Imagine four people. Then, imagine their names being Sake, Uramaki, Kanpachi, and Marie, the main mentor. Finally, imagine there being three nicknames, Agent Three, Agent Eight, and Agent Four.  
  
Kanpachi, or Four, and Marie discussed Booyah Base. Sake and Uramaki, or Three and Eight, were forced to sit together until they made up. Sake thought that all Octarians were evil, and Uramaki thought it was the inklings.  
  
Unfortunately, Kanpachi was completely in the middle. The problem was resolved, so why was one still present?  
  
"You know, I wish Sake would put more effort into achieving her goals." Marie lamented.  
  
Pachi nodded, completely silent and staring into the distance. Sake and Uramaki were still arguing.  
  
"Would you cut it out?" Sake hissed.  
  
"You cut it out!" Uramaki shouted in response.  
  
"Sake, Maki!" Marie commanded, smacking both with her parasol. "No fighting."  
  
"But-"  
  
"Sake," Pachi held up his hand. "Marie's right. You two need to learn to accept your differences and get along."  
  
They both frowned.  
  
"Hmph! You ought to work for the Octarians with your attitude!"  
  
"Sake!" Marie hit her on the head again.  
  
Uramaki thought of a plan.  
  
"Marie, you and Pachi should go out for lunch with me."  
  
"I'd love to, Uramaki."  
  
"Meh, guess it's an offer I can't refuse. Why not?"  
  
The lunch was good. A huge sundae for Uramaki and Marie, and a small sushi plate for Kanpachi.  
  
There was something strange in the plate. It tasted...  
  
"Maki, did you put something unusual in this?"  
  
"Only all of my love."  
  
"I see. Thank you, Uramaki."  
  
Love didn't have a taste, did it?  
  
Marie remarked that her side of the sundae tasted a bit sweeter than normal.  
  
"Isn't that what you like?"  
  
Sweets weren't that good, and Marie wanted to say no, but...   
  
"Absolutely!"  
  
Uramaki was glad that she was more accepted. Some either rejoiced or just didn't care. That made her doing very easy. The one thing about being in the middle of a situation is watching the drama that ensues. Picking a side and watching the other fall apart was a much better alternative. Convincing was also a valid option, although the definition of it differed from person to person.  
  
When the four came back to Octo Valley the next day, Sake was the last to arrive.  
  
She scoped out the area, nervously tugging at her cape. Where was Marie? Where was Pachi?  
  
Tonight was stormy, and although it was clean and safe for inklings, Sake still rushed to Cap'n Cuttlefish's old resting place. Marie was already there, twirling her umbrella.  
  
"Maybe Uramaki was right about you," she whispered. "I suppose all you...inklings are the same."  
  
"Marie may be correct about you as well. I'm ashamed to be related to you in any way."  
  
Pachi was crouched next to Marie. Both of them looked peculiar.  
  
Marie and Pachi both turned around at the same time. They had the same goggles as the octolings Pachi and Maki fought. And since there was no way out...  
  
Sake would be forced to put them on too.


	5. What Are Super Sea Snails For?

I couldn't carry all these snails on my own! Their shells were hard and rocky and I didn't even find these appealing! I never tried them, but they seemed a little strange. I don't know who would eat these, but they looked so cute! The adorable eyes and the way you could pet them were so heart-exploding! I just wish I knew how exactly to spend them. Other than being visually appealing, what could they really do?   
  
Regular cautions of a strange man began popping up. It's all my friends told me recently. He could see and define any prominent features in an inkling from a mile away, including their brand of clothing, somehow could smell those snails from twice that distance, and had the teeth of a carnivore, all sharp and pointy.  
  
Could he be the snail taker?  
  
I grumbled, taking my snails through the plaza. Just like they said, the guy was there in the alley. He was tearing right through a Double-S Snail, as I expected.  
  
Nervous, I smiled and waved.  
  
"Mm?" He looked up at me. "Y'need somethin', mate?"  
  
"You're the Super Sea Snails guy, aren't you?"  
  
"'Course I am. Got any?"  
  
I hauled him all of my snails.  
  
"Blimey..."  
  
He looked like it was the best day of his life. The snails shook in their little shells. I turned away.  
  
"I appreciate it. You're a right _legend_ , mate!"  
  
After pretending to walk away, I looked back to see shattered shells on the floor and him still tearing up the snails like some sort of monster. Staring ahead at my apartment, I walked away. There was a whistle.   
  
"Oi! Ya still got one."  
  
"O-oh yeah! I was still saving it, but-"  
  
"C'mon. Bring it to me, love! Haven't hurt anybody, 'ave I?"  
  
Not wanting to upset him, I slid closer.  
  
"Right, there we go!"  
  
I shook as I set it down.  
  
"Aye, how nice. I'm glad you gave me all these snails."  
  
"Y-You're welcome."  
  
I walked back home.  
  
Never again.


	6. I Don't Get To See My Friend Enough For This

Ponyo had been unconscious for so long that she didn't realize she was somewhere different. Judging by the color scheme, it resembled the Grizzco Industries backrooms.  
  
An inkling who resembled Tomato was propped up against a box, asleep. His hair happened to be adjacent to his face. It didn't even look like the normal inkling or octoling hair.   
  
"It's pleasant to see your mutual again, hm?"  
  
Ponyo turned around, her face turning bright red.  
  
"You disgusting, ruthless Octarian thief! You took my-"  
  
Cho held an E-Liter 4K, aiming at her forehead. Her face made it clear that she didn't want to hear it.  
  
"Look at your friend," she commanded. "Different, is he not?"  
  
Tomato's skin was gray and scaly, his hair no better.  
  
"That's the fate of all the profreshionals, and if you desire to keep your rank, I suggest you stay quiet."  
  
Cho grabbed Ponyo by her parka, dragging her into the front room. Inklings and octolings, all profreshionals, were littered around the floor, either unconscious or yet to become another victim. One in the middle was faintly glowing, that being Melon.  
  
"Mr. Grizz and I have teamed up to create the master race. The more cephalopods work, the more we change, and the more bonuses I get!"  
  
"You're evil." Ponyo hissed.  
  
"Oh, please. As far as I'm aware, you're just another bonus."  
  
She charged and shot.


	7. Delicious, Nutritious, Squid Ink Pasta

Squid Ink Pasta. It was the newest thing on the block. People were calling it revolutionary in taste. Even Crusty Sean liked it and he was a food connoisseur. Only thing is, it rubbed Agent Three the wrong way. Isn't ink how they live?  
  
She sighed, turning off the stove. Four had wanted her to eat a bit even if she had already eaten.  
  
"Four, don't you think this is enough?"  
  
"Not at all. Two more plates should be just fine."  
  
"Why not give them to Eight?"  
  
"Booyah!" Eight beamed, smiling.  
  
Three looked disappointed. She was eighteen and letting a sixteen-year-old boss her and another eighteen-year-old around. On the other hand, she didn't want to make her upset. She was considerate and at least a bit thoughtful.  
  
Her eyes closed as she felt the last lump of noodles go down her throat. So slimy and disgusting...  
  
"Ah, you look thirsty. Drink something, my pleasure."  
  
By now, Three was very tired. After drinking all of her Run-Speed Raspberry, she sat back down at the table, making sure Four didn't try anything fishy directed at Eight.  
  
There was a pot of steaming noodles right above her nose. She felt a squeeze on her stomach and threw up right into the pot.  
  
"Oh my! I'm so sorry-"  
  
"No, it's okay. We'll make another one."  
  
"Alright," she grumbled. "Goodnight, Four."  
  
"Night."  
  
Eight watched with regret in her eyes as Three rubbed her eyes and climbed up the stairs.  
  
"I feel bad. She just wanted noodles."  
  
"You shouldn't. It's Squid Ink Pasta."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Delicious, nutritious, Squid Ink Pasta."  
  
Eight felt a pang of nausea in her system.  
  
Four looked at her with a sinister orange glare. She grabbed Eight's head, pointing her head into the pot as she contributed to the ink pile.  
  
Eight whimpered as she headed up the stairs as well.  
  
Four was a menace.  
  
And she knew it all too well.


	8. Empty Saltspray

It was a long time since the Great Turf War. Everything was resolved.  
  
So, why did Three still feel so angry? There was a great big rage in her hearts. All those days of fighting Octarians and patrolling the kettles and streets of Inkopolis had told her everything. They never changed, and they never would, and Three wasn't buying it. No matter what Cap'n said, she knew.  
  
Just looking at anything that wasn't an inkling made her sick to her stomach. Whenever she went on one of her rants, Callie and Marie always disguised it as some sort of 'manic episode'. But it wasn't.   
  
Three had, one day, went to lunch with the Sisters. Saltspray Rig was dark, making it all the more atmospheric.  
  
"Did you know that the museum statues sometimes laugh?"  
  
"Callie, nobody buys that carp anymore."  
  
Both sisters laughed uproariously.  
  
A lost Octarian was wandering around. Marie was the first to take notice. She was about to say something when she looked at her phone.  
  
"Callie," she tugged on her cousin's arm. "Gramps."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"It might just be one of her episodes again. She usually snaps out of it in a few minutes."  
  
Callie and Marie left without a trace.  
  
Three hopped down from the moving grate, desperately searching for the lost girl. Once found, she tackled her to the ground.  
  
"Wh-Who are you?!" she whimpered, struggling. "Identify yourself!"  
  
One well-aimed Bamboozler shot fixed that quickly.  
  
For some reason, Three felt tempted. Hungry.  
  
She looked at the Octarian and opened her mouth.


	9. Dissed Red-Handed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'll continue this soon enough, I promise.

Blackbelly Skatepark was a great hangout spot. Inklings would go there and test their skills. Even some bands, including Bottom Feeders, would come and go. The wind shuffled the trees as a skateboard was in use. As soon as Marina got a gift for Warabi, he and Ikkan would go here more.

"Shift into the riding position," muttered the cephalopod. "Learn to turn..."

He was shifting back and forth, his wheels curving. Since Marina knew that his parents never let him do this until he moved out, she got him a longboard. Even if it was for beginners, this beginner was still unsure about the procedure. If only Marina could teach him. She was so cool.

The sound of wheels against asphalt repeated. Warabi took a deep breath.

"I'm nervous."

"You're nervous?" asked his bandmate. "I'll help if you want."

"What would you know about skating? I thought you were just some guy!"

"Well," he pointed to his shirt. "Do I look like I'd know about skating?"

By this point, Warabi obviously knew about Ikkan's past vocal work. He sounded like a guy who would skate, but every time he'd seen him on a board, he was sitting on it. Cool enough to ride one, but probably doesn't.

"Not really."

"Good, because I don't. I heard about the basics from Marina, but that's it."

He looked back.

"Do you even know how to ride one?"

"I just said that I don't-"

A loud alarm interrupted them. This one was different, unlike the one announcing that it was almost time for Turf Wars to take place. Right now, people could skate before the fact. There was a food joint nearby so they could eat too. Warabi didn't want anybody to see him fall, so he went with it, eyes widening with each full circle the wheels made.  
He was doing it! He was really riding it!

And he rode it right into someone else. They didn't mind, turning around. This someone else was Paruko, sporting a pink longboard with a unicorn painted on the bottom. Unicorns were ancient and land-dwelling creatures, or they would've been, at least. Ikkan and a lot of others think that they never existed, but Warabi was gullible. He wasn't stupid, and Ikkan described him as smart, but he liked colorful things.

ABXY's lead singer sat down with him, looking for any injuries. She gave him a smile, looking at his gift.

"So cool..." she whispered. Her eyes had a certain glow to them. She got up, hopping on her board, and rode off.

A tall shadow painted itself on the pavement.

"You've got to be more careful," he said, hoisting up his friend. "I'm surprised you didn't bite it there."

"That reminds me! She told me about this video game urban legend once. There was a cutscene in this old game where this guy's face was-"

"Don't listen to anything she tells you. She's just ABXY's weird synth player and vocalist."

"I thought Squid Squad had a weird synth player and vocalist."

If looks could kill, Warabi would be in the midst of respawning.

"No more from you."

He carried him back to where they sat, catching a glimpse of Tangle, Bottom Feeders' vocalist. He just sat there, waiting for no one in particular and fixing his glasses. Fin had to make fun of him for that, no doubt about it. Speaking of Fin, they came right up and stole them with a laugh, Tangle trailing along. Heels sauntered to his former spot. Their owner twirled her hair, looking at the ensuing chaos, only stopped by the band's drummer. 

It wasn't easy to hear her, but she might've called them 'fools'. This was Ink Theory's kazoo player. Despite her profession, she wasn't one to laugh at. She was known as the pretty one. After looking on, she turned towards Diss-Pair. Warabi's anxiousness did nothing to stop it.

"I didn't expect you to be here."

She bent down, grabbing the board. She looked displeased. Why was she even here? Trying to think of an answer, Warabi played with his hands.

"Well?!" shouted the kazoo-ist, Bibi, noticing that he was staring. "Anything to say?"

"C-Can I," he squeaked and stuttered. "Can I have it back please?"

Bibi burst into laughter. "That's what you sound like?!"

"I know I sound stupid, you don't have to rub it in my face!"

She gave another laugh.

"Oh, please. The only thing I'd rub in your face is how much better our music is."

With that, she left Warabi and Ikkan dumbfounded, the latter grabbing the longboard.

"She's toast."


	10. Superjump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is not a Pastebin drabble. I have to finish what I started.

"Hey, come on! She didn't mean it, did she?"

The spindly inkling wielded the wheeled board, walking towards the good-looking girl of the same species. He had the same blank face painted on. If he smiled, Warabi would definitely have to stop him now. He chased after him, trying to hop up and pull him back. Unfortunately, he only grabbed his shirt. Ikkan didn't mind too much. He kept on walking and entered the main arena. Usually, this is where the enemy team would spawn.

Warabi cowered behind his friend, whimpering.

"You don't have to do this, you know! Settle down, we'll figure something out!"

"I won't start trouble unless someone else does."

"Why not ignore her?"

"Better to fix the problem than keep it going."

He frowned, tugging at his shirt again. This guy was a grown man! He was _so_ heavy! Telling him to give up wouldn't do. His persistence made it hard. If anybody else said this, it still wouldn't feel right to him, but Bibi had a grudge against them. She called their music loud, scratchy, and unsophisticated. If it wasn't jazz, she didn't want to hear it. What high horse was she on?

Yoko was spotted practicing since Aachin dragged the rest of her band here. She practically choked on her spit when the other band drew close. Knowing something would happen, she stopped playing. She'd make a move if she had to, but this could be different. After eighty-million tries to make amends, the bigger person could _be_ their role for once and just end it.

"Hello, Yoko."

"Oh," She wasn't expecting him to answer. "Hello."

Bibi heard the conversing and turned around, heels matching her movement. She smiled, flipping her hair in front of her shoulders. What a snob.

"Back already? I expected your emotions to get the better of you."

He tensed up. Every word that came out of her mouth felt like sandpaper to his brain. If she said another word, he'd _have_ to take action.

"Ikkan, just say sorry. It's easier to back away than continue."

She laughed harder than before. Seeing them like this was like seeing a stereotype, but it was actually them! This was absolutely hysterical. It was just the thing she needed to keep laughing. And she did. Her laugh, more so a witch cackle, spread through the area. She didn't want to forfeit. Every second of this moment was making her crack up more and more, cracking the other party's self-control.

"What is it?" she teased. "Aren't you upset? I'm surprised you haven't killed anybody yet. Hahaha!"

It took _lots_ of work to hold back the skateboard he tried to raise above his head. Bibi thought that, if he was going to make a move, he should at least be unpredictable. As always, he managed to disappoint. She vocalized this, saying that it was nothing new. The more negativity she spoke, the less she'd be able to get out of this in one piece _or_ be able to see Warabi desperately trying to stop what was happening. His hands would practically break the board if he held on for another minute. Ikkan asked him to let go.

"Please don't do this! Just--ugh--apologize and this will be over with!"

"I'd be over with it quicker if you let go."

"No! _You_ need to let go!"

He soon, out of silent rage, overpowered him. The object lifted over his head, and he was about ready to swing it. His grip would be sure to knock someone unconscious.

As if somebody got on Lady Luck's side, the bell rang, Warabi sighing in relief. He quickly apologized to everybody with Bibi, dragging the hostile squid and his weapon of choice away. The squid spoke in a deeper, more raspy voice, like the one he used when performing _Seasick_.

"This _isn't_ over, Bibi."

"Hah! H-He's just joking, guys! Come on, we can't be here for two hours!"

"I'm serious."

He groaned.

"Oh my god..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end. Thank you!


End file.
